life experience

February 25, 2011 – Do you know what’s weird?

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Besides the obvious of being a grown-up with a mortgage, two offspring about to enter the tween years, a career in a field I would have never imagined and an intense dislike for all things that pierce my hyperacusis.

Here’s what else I am finding to be weird:

Reading in a booklet my son received from school about puberty that explains it’s normal for a boy to feel afraid that he might be growing boobies.

Walking around an estate sale in an extremely expensive home without any comprehension of how anyone could acquire so many things and then sell every last one of them away.

Having monthly menstrual cramps without a uterus.

Yelling at my kids to be quiet when I have spent the entire day missing them and wishing we were together.

The desire to parent my parents on occasion.

Having hormonal breakdowns with all of the intensity and angst of a 14-year-old in heat shivering through the aged body of a 43-year-old in the dog days of summer.

Reading some of the pages of this blog and having absolutely no memory of writing them.

And that was just today.

February 24, 2011 – The Weighted Pendulum

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The swing in my lever has slowed dramatically and the weight at my lower end has tipped the balance away from a properly regulated internal mechanism.

Imagine the speed of light in reverse, tucking away all caloric anomalies into every available cellulose prison thereby altering any previously reconditioned structure into a lopsidedly out-of-sync, swaying mass.

That’s pretty much what I experienced upon seeing a photo of me taken today.

:o(

February 23, 2011 – Time to Narrow Some Focus

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Let’s face it. I’ve been successful in updating this blog daily for over a month. Some of the posts have been decent, some better and some worse. I have done no promotions or tagging and fully expect that I have an equal amount of readers. I used to write with a bit more passion than I do today. Not sure if I was less tired then or less eager now.

I do not where I want to take this writing, and yet, my instinct is nagging me that I need to take it somewhere. Daily journal blogging does not have a draw for anyone outside of lonely, obsessed stalkers (of which, I am sure I have none) or loved ones who read out of love (loved ones that I am totally, humbly grateful for and wish I got to see more often).

I don’t think I could be a movie critic – not because I don’t love to insert my opinion about films, rather because I rarely get to see movies fresh out of the can.

My kids are now too old for me to get into the “mom-blog” racket.

My husband would flip out if I became a relationship blogger. (Although, that would make for an awesome April-fools joke.)

I could fill these pages with my sudden fiction – which I do infrequently post, and yet, I’m not too sure about being able to pull off 1000 words a day that isn’t pure verbal diarrhea. (I know what you’re thinking – what’s the difference with a few extra words?)

I am full of political opinions that would be a totally inappropriate to juxtapose with my daily life where I am the wee small minority voice trying to get through each day without making a ripple.

I do not know how to fix cars, small appliances or electronics. I am not an expert in nutrition, fitness or anything in the realm of “healthy living.” My travel escapades are limited to once a year within a few hundred mile radius. I have not embarked on a life changing trek or self imposed rally cry to recreate every Julia Childs’ recipe or walk across the country blindfolded.

I do have an uncanny ability to MacGyver odd situations where marriage licenses, small combustible rockets and Halloween costumes are concerned. However, those superpowers are not needed on a regular basis and I have no idea when I will see the paper-clipped, tube sock sky light requiring my skills.

I can answer a “yes” or “no” question with a three-hour powerpoint presentation lecture complete with handouts, souvenir chachkis and that special glassy film to go over your eyes so you can discreetly zone-out.

Mostly, I love to talk. With my keyboard.

Hence where this blog has landed.