Daily Goal

March 8, 2011 – Too Many Devices

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I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. No drugs. Trying very hard to lower sugar intake. No porn or plastic surgery or gambling for me.

I will occasionally OD on sausage, biscuits and gravy at IHOP. I’ve been known to watch marathons of my favorite Sci-fi shows. And I am defenseless against the Sting Arts.

I got to thinking…

As I sit in my comfy chair (old blue Lazyboy recliner), I have my cute white MacBook in my lap with my iPod Touch connected and charging while I text my brother on my Blackberry after having just uploaded photos from my old-school-ish digital camera as I watch (bad) television on our 51-inch screen TV.

My vices may be limited but my devices are beginning to crowd me.

March 7, 2011 – With My Eyes Closed

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With my eyes closed, I see shadows and lights tracing the underside of my eyelids. I feel the roundness of my eyeballs and the moisture that keeps them from drying out.

With my eyes closed, I see images of shark’s teeth, baleen bristles filtering salt water for sustenance, and darkness all around. The weight of my lashes keeps my eyes from opening, trapping out visual clarity.

With my eyes closed, I pray for the beauty in love to overtake my heart, the ugliness of hate to be expelled from my brain and the idiocy of perceived wisdom vanish from my mirror. The bone of my eye sockets serve as the hardened damn preventing both escape and access.

With my eyes closed, I weep with sadness in memory of my familiar’s departure from reality, years of moments left un-lived and singularly simple joys that make it all worth something. I feel and see all things differently.

With my eyes closed.

March 6, 2011 – Paying the Bills

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That’s what I need to be doing. Writing checks. Figuring out why our checking account is off by $92.55. Adjusting budgets to maintain ourselves until the next payday. Ordering flowers for my mother’s birthday. Folding the latest pile of clean clothes to come out of the dryer.

All sorts of things that I am not doing at the moment.

I will, I’m sure, soon since I won’t be able to sleep well with some of that looming over my head.

I try to play hookie and it only ends up biting my psyche in the ass and I end up dreaming about all sorts of whacked out things – tornado’s exploding my home, sinking to the bottom of the ocean in my sweet car, fighting with my spouse while searching for my lost cat.

And then I think – everyone needs to play hookie every now and again, right? Just to keep from having an aneurysm or hypothermia of the heart or misplaced morals?

I mean a real, extended period of time without administering to each and every one of my deadlines, responsibilities or shoulds.

Will it count if I plan it and make sure I have taken care of all that shit first?